When you are a single mom the first holiday without your kids can be devastating.
This year my kids were with me the last week of school and we tried to incorporate some fun pre-Christmas activities. For example we decorated pre-baked cookies. When they were really little my Mom was still alive and would bring over gingerbread people she had baked for the kiss to decorate. I still feel the absence of her especially at the holidays. I can bake but rarely make time. So ours were pre-baked but it was still fun to decorate one evening when the homework load was light for everyone.
The week leading up to Christmas, their first week of Christmas break, my kids were with dad and they had a lot more time for activities. This year we didn’t get to do a lot of things we would have together so some of those will have to wait until after Christmas.
One thing that you may find really hard to face, as I do, is to see your family sitting in the pew at church on Christmas Eve with your husband of 20 years and his girlfriend. It can drive you to the brink of heartbreak.
When you first divorce you may have high ideas of how well you will get along and co-parent from different houses. But this is unlikely. In my case things went statically south once the other woman openly entered the picture.
Christmases bring out any competition there may be between the parents as you are tempted to make your childrens’ Christmas the most special with gifts and experiences. You have half as much time to pack all this in as you used to and the loss is real.
I have decided that what you have to do is do whatever you need to to stay calm and provide your kids with a stable environment which they may not be receiving on the other end.
Notes From Real Life 